Archive for December 13, 2011

“The world ain’t going to save itself”

Posted in Articles on December 13, 2011 by oldcountrystrong

Last week on OCS we had our annual “Strong is Beautiful” week. If you are coming to the site to read inspirational true life stories, I highly recommend you look at last week’s posts. Today though we are focusing on another important subject. The “Occupy “INSERT CITY NAME”” movement? The race for the Republican nomination? Forget that shit, the trailer for the new GI Joe movie was released.

A quick disclosure; my family are huge GI Joe fans. We got GI Joe tattoos and dress up like GI Joe characters for Halloween. I was so pumped for the last movie, me and Z got absolutely faded in the parking lot outside the Cinerama waiting the midnight showing…and than I drove across the state to go court the next morning. And while we are being honest, the first GI Joe movie was not very good. It had a few moments but it was too corny, they tried too much to make it like the TV series and had super vipers and sonic weapons and submarine battles. The movie script was like trying to get your money’s worth in a 2 hour drinking pass at  a Las Vegas tattoo parlor and bar, seems like a good idea at first that eventually leads to you hoping you will vomit to feel better.  There’s the old line “If it ain’t broke don’t fix it”, well the first GI Joe movie was broke so god damn it lets fix it. My faith in Hollywood is at stake. Let’s see what we got.

Fuck yes! There are a couple things that I noticed in this trailer which gives me hope.

1. As stated before, the first movie was lackluster. Since this is a sequel how can we fix this? Distance ourselves from the first movie as much as possible. There are a grand total of 5 actors returning from the last movie, which for an ensemble cast movie is a lot of turnover. They are basically pulling a Marvel here. You remember “The Hulk” movie? The one with Eric Ban where they didn’t follow the comic script. There’s a reason you don’t. It was so bad Marvel decided to make a second movie, “The Incredible Hulk” with Ed Norton, and basically act like the first one never happened (quick side note: Ed Norton got fucking screwed in the upcoming Avengers movie, he was the perfect Bruce Banner). Let’s hope we have similar results here.

2. Putting front stage the actor who should have been in the first GI Joe movie, Dwayne “the Rock” Johnson, president elect of Cascadia. The Rock was made for GI Joe. And they are making up for lost time by having him narrate the whole trailer. The Rock got ready for this role too because he didn’t get into movie shape, he got into pro wrestling shape. When he is holding Roadblock’s .50 cal he looks like he could do it. I have feeling we are going to have a huge throwdown between him and some Cobra baddie where he will layeth the smack down.

3. There will be a lot of Joe casualities in the movie. I only saw Duke in the beginning, could he get killed off? Fine by me, Duke is the Cyclops of the GI Joe squad, the fucking boyscout no one likes.

4. An epic battle between ninjas on the side of a mountain. If that doesn’t get you hot than you are probably on the wrong site right now.

Posted by Nickay