The Kobayashi Maru…

What? Are you serious? You’ve never heard of The Kobayashi Maru.

What next your gonna tell me you’re unfamiliar with the Gordian Knot?

Well if you’er not familiar with the name I’m going to have to explain it to you or this whole post might go over your head. The Kobayashi Maru is a Test. Actually scratch that, The Kobayashi Maru is THE TEST. if we all think back to what we learned from Billy the Kid in Young Guns, “You have to test yourself every day, gentlemen. Once you stop testing yourself, you get slow. And when that happens they kill ya…” Billy was wise beyond his years. But not wise enough to not show his back to someone he couldn’t trust. But what he said about Testing yourself is true.

Now as I said, The Kobayashi Maru is THE TEST. The big one. Well at least the reference should apply to whatever you Test or Task you may be placing before yourself.

For those of you that are unfamiliar with this Test, it’s actually from Star Trek. If you rolled your eyes when you read that move your keyboard or labtop forward and take a pen. With that pen draw an X on your table. Look at it really hard. I mean until you feel cross eyed. Then slam your face down hard. Because you deserve that.

Star Trek was Rad son. Captain Kirk was a Bad ass that wondered the galaxy picking up more hot alien chicks then guys that got blasted wearing red uniforms. If you don’t like Kirk you probably don’t like Han Solo either, which means you’re not much of a scoundrel and Testing yourself is something you only do through Words with Friends. Another trip to that X on your desk is probably called for right now.

We’re talking original outlaws here, real OG’s. You gotta give Star Trek it’s props.

I’m getting off topic. The Kobayashi Maru was a Star Fleet Test. The objective was simple. A civilian ship called The Kobayashi Maru was disabled in the Klingon Neutral Zone. The ship was sending out a MAYDAY call. Now any Starfleet ship entering the zone would be in violation of the Organian Peace Treaty. The Test called for the ship under the command of the cadet captain being Tested to decide whether he should give the order and attempt the rescue of the Kobayashi Maru crew. Now the test involved being knowingly outnumbered by Klingon Birds of Prey. Giving the order and attempting the rescue pretty much lead to certain death. But by not giving the order, death was certain for the crew of the Kobayashi Maru.

In all the years the Test had been in place no one had successfully rescued the crew of the Kobayashi Maru. It was considered a fouls errand to retake the test after failing it. Everyone failed the Kobayashi Maru.

Quite simply put, the Kobayashi Maru was designed to place cadet captains in a place where no matter what they did it wasn’t enough, to accept fear, to acknowledge that there were somethings out of your hands. The Kobayashi Maru was a No-Win Situation, it’s that simple.

Unless if you don’t accept that.

Somethings should stick out in your mind through cinema history.The finally chase scene in last of the mochians. Bodhi telling Johnny Utah that he was “Just waiting for my Set…” And when Captain James T. Kirk told it how it was.

Kirk was the only Cadet in history to pass the Kobayashi Maru. It was impossible but he pulled it off.

And how?

Simple, when asked Kirk dropped some knowledge that would would stick with my at any point in my life when I was Testing myself. “I don’t Believe in a No-Win Scenario…” Gangster.

But how did he do it? Outside the box thinking that’s how. He did what no one else every did.

He Cheated. Hello, I compared him to Han Solo, Scoundrel anyone? Kirk wouldn’t accept the No-Win Situation so he rewired the test simulator so he could Win. Cause that’s what winners do when the game is on the line. They want the ball.

So what does the Kobayashi Maru have to do with today post, everything. My own personal Test has been much more simple as of late. I’m trying to do good by all those that follow what the I/C does and at the same time I’m trying to spread the good word of Kettlebell Sport. It’s funny because everywhere the Club goes to compete or I go to Coach we’re meet almost as outsiders. At Crossfit competitions, we’re looked at as kettlebellers. At Kettlebell meets we’re looked at as crossfitters. And don’t even get me started on Olympic Meets. We had more exceptance at the one powerlifting meet I coached at then at the Oly Meets we’ve attended.

Now don’t get me wrong, I don’t have a chip on my shoulder but Elitism isn’t a good thing. I’ve been involved in odd sports my whole life. Martial arts to wrestling, wrestling to rugby, rugby to god know the laundry list of shit I’ve been up to the last 5 years. But pretty much all of my sports had low attendance factors. People didn’t usually want to come watch that shit. But when they did it was awesome. When people wanted to talk to you about and get to know more about what exactly it was you did it was fun.

So what the fuck happen to enjoying people taking an interest in your Sport. I’m not talking about everyone. Every community has good apples and bad ones. But when the bad ones chose to act like elitist that’s when I get pissed (Ok maybe a small chip on my shoulder.)

You know a lot of people like to throw stones at the elitism that some crossfitters put out. Now I crossfit but I wouldn’t consider myself a die heart anymore. But the funny thing about it is a lot of sports wouldn’t be seeing a resurgence if it wasn’t for Crossfit. Like I said currently I’m busting my ass off to grow a following for the Sport of Kettlebell lifting. And where am I seeing the most acceptance? In the Crossfit community. Why? Because they open up to new ideas and forms of training.

So one side is starting to want to play ball. But some from the other side don’t want that. Uuuuhhhh… What?
Great now your elistism is gonna effect their elitism. Now what. Now we’re in a god damn No-Win scenario where both camps are gonna think theyre better then the other.

I don’t believe in No-Win situations.

We’re gonna keep grinding. The Clubs gonna keep doing what it does. If people don’t like it, than the hell with them. Too heavy, too light, why this, why that, too much kettlebells or not enough. Heres what I say, Fucking Enough.

The Clubs going to continue to be an ambassador for multiple sports in every arena we enter. We’ll carry our flag every where we go. We’re gonna wave it as high we can, and when we wrecks shit with classic I/C Swagger people will know where to find us.

I’m not gonna let infighting or elitism cause a No-Win scenario. Becasue I don’t believe in those. If that makes me a scoundrel then I guess I’m never going to change my outlaw ways.

Posted by: Z

7 Responses to “The Kobayashi Maru…”

  1. Strong post.

    We should start pounding Tranya on heavy lifting days.

  2. jodiboates Says:

    i grew up a “trekie” i get it 🙂

    Kettle bells are where it at. Something you will be able to do for a lifetime. I see nothing but bennifits to lifting KB’s. They will never be heavy enough to do real damage, yet challanging enough to knock you on your ass everytime! They are no joke.

    The fact that it is a sport only makes it better. It satisfies the competitor inside all of us

    Well written Z, thnak-you

  3. Eric Christanson Says:

    Well written! Give em hell!

  4. one more thing Z..your passion alone will conquer any no win situation you come up against.

    passsion is the simple answer to success

  5. Well said, Zach. They’ll come around. They’ll have no choice because you produce results.

  6. Great to read this post Zach. It’s awesome you have the open mind that you do. From whatever “camp” they come, all are welcome. You have set yourself apart from the herd with your open mind and training style. IMO that is really why you guys are as good as you are…that along with smart programming a shit ton of hard work.

    Keep spread’n the good word, we’re all learning from each other.

  7. “Dammit Jim, I’m a doctor not a… WHAT THE FUUUUUUUCK…” – Bones looking at some weird space STD on Captain Kirk’s love phaser

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