The title of todays post couldn’t be truer, Coach Jeff told me this once before. I like to think he thinks my intensity is a good thing. That the times I’ve worked out around him and he’s just smiled and shook his head were a good thing. I like to think Coach can probably just see my love of the Iron game. It’s more likely that he can recognize that kamikaze look in my eye though.
Lets back track almost two months. I had just finished WOD 2 in the Crossfit Games online Open two days before, and I wanted to lift, you guys might remember the article I’m talking about. Well I had an ugly miss on a three wheel clean and felt lucky that I still had my left hand attached. I told myself it was just a nasty sprain and to MANUP and keep competing. Well as of 3 o’clock today come to find out I was very wrong.
I knew something was wrong, but I wasn’t gonna admit it to myself and certainly not to anyone around me. To steal a line from Jerry Macquire, “Heart!?! Motha Fucka I’m all Heart!!!”
Well sometimes being tough just makes you stupid. Come to find out from my doctor today that my wrist is and has been broken.
Let’s have a recap of what I’ve decide to do to myself since my injury more then two months ago.
I finished the Open.
During that competition I almost got 32 reps on the clean and jerk workout a week after the break and had a strong showing in the thruster, chest to bar pullup workout.
I was involved in a three week Olympic lifting Bulgarian style program.
I hit 230 or above on the snatch in 6 lifting session and hit more 200+ snatches then I care to think about.
I traveled to Russia and became a certified KettleBell sport Coach.
There were 5 long training days and I competed on a relay team at the camp where I long cycled 30 reps in two minutes.
I competed as a member of my affiliate team at the Crossfit Games Northwest Regional qualifier.
I hit 235 on the thruster ladder and was on a team that qualified for the third day of competition.
Cool huh?
No not really. Tough? Yes. Stupid? Very.
Lets talk about what I really did to myself in that time.
I finished the Open.
I willingly invited myself to further my injury to a point where I could need surgery.
I was involved in a three week Olympic lifting Bulgarian style program.
I made the choice that 3 weeks of training was more important than setting the example to “Rest.”
I traveled to Russia and became a certified KettleBell sport Coach.
I almost ruined a once in a lifetime opportunity to train abroad because I was too stupid to sit things out.
I competed as a member of my affiliate team at the Crossfit Games Northwest regional qualifier.
This one will stick with me for awhile. I forced my friends and family to watch me gut through 20 minutes of hell when my wrist went out on day three.
When I look at this in the right light I realize something. I was stupid. I’m tough, I have heart, I’m proud of that. But it’s not the example I want to set. Injuries are injuries, they happen and there isn’t anything we can do but accept them. I didn’t accept mine and that’s a bit selfish. I would NEVER allow one of my athletes to compete like that. I would have had them pull out of the Open in the beginning, but I gritted my teeth and kept moving. Tough? Yes. Stupid? Extremely.
We all learn from our mistakes and I have learned from this one. When something feels wrong, chances are, somethings wrong. I never want to put my friends or family through what I made them sit and watch. I could have thrown in the towel but I didn’t. That’s not who I am. But I should have never risked what I did. I’ll learn from this and it will make me a better Coach.
My Dad came up to me after the last event at Regionals (he was the first one to, more so he was the only one who felt comfortable enough to) and said something that will stay with me.
“You know Zach, your brain and heart can only tell your body to do so much before the muscles and tendons stop listening.”
I just nodded my head, this is how my Dad and I communicate. I never wanted to believe that, but he was right. Something was wrong and my body had enough of me being stupid.
Tough? Yes. Stupid? More then I even care to admit.
I can only imagine Coach’s expression when I email him about this. Thanks to all my friends and family who supported me when I was to stubborn to listen.
Posted by: Z
Old Country Strong: Life and Lifting 