I hear it all the time…
“I needed this.”
“This made my day.”
“This is what I look forward to all day…”
Do you love it? Do you love the chalk? The Clanging of metal? The scream or tears that accomplishing a goal brings? When I was young and starting out I didn’t get it.
Well I’m still young and sometimes I still don’t get it. I hear the metal, there isn’t an article of clothes I own that doesn’t have chalk on it. I share in everyone I trains joy. But what happens when the thing you love crushes you? We’ve all been there. Your outside life consumes the place where you can be yourself and just let go.
You train, you put in the work, today is your day or your week. But when you approach the bar your hands touch the metal and the demons creep in. I’ve written about it before. You harness it. You take the rage and things out of your control and put it into what you love to do.
But when you feel the weight those demons creep in and your warm up set feels like a million pounds. You blame your diet, work, girlfriend, husband, dog, car problems anything that isn’t what’s really distracting you.
1 missed rep
“Why did I drink this weekend, how come my boss doesn’t get it, why don’t people stay out of my business.”
2 missed reps
“It wasn’t suppose to be like this, I was gonna smash the old me today, I was going to take start over today. Fuck, why is this heavy I’ve done this for 20 before. Why are people looking at me. Stop looking at me, I know i shouldn’t be struggling.”
3 missed reps
“Why are they playing this music, why isn’t anyone taking this shit serious today? This it’s just a social club. This is bullshit. This isn’t how it was suppose to happen.”
4 missed reps
“Fuck this I’m just gonna grip it and rip it.”
5 missed reps
“Why is this bar so heavy. I hate this. This is stupid why would I put myself though this? I’m done. I’m just done with this, I could be watching football, hanging with my friends at the bar, doing anything but failing right now. ”
Sound familiar? I’ve seen it happen to the best of us. Work, family, the shit that is supposed to be the last thing on your mind….
Let me steal a line from gladiator, “There was a dream that was Rome.”
If your familiar with Old Country you may know it started so small. It wasn’t even Old Country then. It was West Seattle Barbell Club. There was five of us. And this is what we had to get away from the world. It was a safe place. It helped me deal with the hills and valleys of life. No matter what I had the Club. I had an hour or two a day where life stood still and nothing else mattered.
I brought it with me in my training. I wanted people to feel the same sense of family I felt with those four people. Screw your job and commitments lets lift, lets flip tires, and drag kettlebells up the driveway. When things are small it’s easy to deal with problems.
But when things grow. Problem grows. Bars grow heavy. What do you do when your problem outweigh the bar. What happens when your gym, or Club, or simple hour you get to spend not thinking turns into what you think about all day? It’s not your safe place. You dread the bar. You dread the weight. You dread the struggle to overcome goals.
Most people don’t get it. Most never will. I don’t understand why some people do the things they do. Why would I buy that car? Why run that marathon? Why care what other think? Why let this person mentor you or look up to someone like you never have? Your strength gives other strength what are you doing Why put yourself out there? Why not take that chance? Why never take the risk?
Sometimes the iron fixes every thing. For some that’s the highlight of their day. Why do we do this? Why do we put ourselves through this? Why let someone yell at me? Be my Coach, but my trust in them and have them put it back in me. Is the risk worth it all? Does a pr or a silly Club mean that much?
It does to me. I battle demons at the bar all the time. Sometimes they weigh me down. I’m so proud of those that push through them and wish I could be them and help those that can’t.
Is it worth it to put that much into someone or believe in someone who much? Sometimes I really think it is. Sometimes I don’t know. But I know at the end of the day I’ll do it day in and out because of one thing. The Iron game keeps me sane. Even when nothing else in the world makes sense I can grab iron and make sense. I’ve learned to accept the demons. The good and the bad. When you battle through the rain, even though it’s actually the sky that’s falling.
It’s for the love of the Game. Sometimes it’s the only thing that makes sense.
Posted by: Z
Old Country Strong: Life and Lifting 
